Step Class
This morning, I had went to a step class, determined to complete it with a smile. I was at the front of the class, with access to the door just in case I wanted to bail, if needed. Again, I was determined to finish the class regardless of my anxious feelings.
I only had the step with no riser's, because my coordination isn't up to par yet and I didn't want to trip. I was stepping on the floor most of the time and I only stepped up and down maybe 20% of the time. I was okay with that, though, because it felt safe for me not to be too high. I original grabbed two riser's and came to my senses right away, knowing that it would be a mistake. It was an old way of thinking and I knew that the ability of my body wasn't there, yet.
I didn't really work up a sweat like everyone else. The reason, I cannot use my arms to increase the heart rate because of my lack of coordination. It was difficult to move my legs fast enough never mind adding the arms to the equation. Every once in awhile I would give it a try, but ultimately, I didn't have success so I dropped the arms right away.
There were many great lessons here for me. Besides my acceptance of being where I am at with no expectations, there is one thing I took from being in front of the class full of people. I enjoyed having my back to the entire class, which is funny because an older gent had shared with me at the beginning of class that he was hoping to be in the back (to avoid being noticed - I assumed). But, for me, it was great not to care about what people were thinking and to focus on what I can do without any distractions from people in the front. I could see the instructor, she was directly to the side, but I could see her reflection of the window quite clearly. This was an amazing thing to experience, I learned that windows tell a lot about what you are seeing.
I have a lot of respect for all the instructors at South Surrey Recreational Center. They are very good at what they do and there is no ego. The only ego I experience is my own, and that is enough. The smile that I was wanting to achieve, happened after I stopped stepping. The focus was on the steps; which was evident with my no smiling. However, I didn't cry this time and in fact, there was much joy with my success of completing the class and my willingness to stay.
Definitely, hats off to me for doing it, and loving it was a bonus!
I only had the step with no riser's, because my coordination isn't up to par yet and I didn't want to trip. I was stepping on the floor most of the time and I only stepped up and down maybe 20% of the time. I was okay with that, though, because it felt safe for me not to be too high. I original grabbed two riser's and came to my senses right away, knowing that it would be a mistake. It was an old way of thinking and I knew that the ability of my body wasn't there, yet.
I didn't really work up a sweat like everyone else. The reason, I cannot use my arms to increase the heart rate because of my lack of coordination. It was difficult to move my legs fast enough never mind adding the arms to the equation. Every once in awhile I would give it a try, but ultimately, I didn't have success so I dropped the arms right away.
There were many great lessons here for me. Besides my acceptance of being where I am at with no expectations, there is one thing I took from being in front of the class full of people. I enjoyed having my back to the entire class, which is funny because an older gent had shared with me at the beginning of class that he was hoping to be in the back (to avoid being noticed - I assumed). But, for me, it was great not to care about what people were thinking and to focus on what I can do without any distractions from people in the front. I could see the instructor, she was directly to the side, but I could see her reflection of the window quite clearly. This was an amazing thing to experience, I learned that windows tell a lot about what you are seeing.
I have a lot of respect for all the instructors at South Surrey Recreational Center. They are very good at what they do and there is no ego. The only ego I experience is my own, and that is enough. The smile that I was wanting to achieve, happened after I stopped stepping. The focus was on the steps; which was evident with my no smiling. However, I didn't cry this time and in fact, there was much joy with my success of completing the class and my willingness to stay.
Definitely, hats off to me for doing it, and loving it was a bonus!
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